Denver Seminary

ENGAGE 17 "IN THIS WORLD YOU WILL HAVE TROUBLE. BUT TAKE HEART! I HAVE OVERCOME THE WORLD"(JOHN 16:33). Rochelle's pregnancy was fraught with serious complications, starting when her water broke at just 15 weeks and ending with a mandated two-month hospital stay with complete bed rest. At every turn, doctors told Rochelle and Benson that the baby could not survive, let alone thrive, without fluids. But they were wrong. Baby Hannah was born at 33-and-a-half weeks and was a petite, but healthy, 4.39 pounds. Her lungs, which were of the greatest concern to the doctors throughout the pregnancy, were 100 percent perfect. She was a miracle. There was just one small problem with her bowel that the doctors were going to fix in a minor surgery that would take less than an hour. In the Scriptures, James warns us that we will encounter trials of various kinds, but crucibles of this magnitude become landmarks—afterward, everything else is defined as having come before or after that one significant point. For Benson and Rochelle, that time was when the doctors came to them partway through the surgery and said, "We need to talk to you." Defining moments reveal, test, and shape the lives of the people who walk through them. The Ngatias' defining moment had come. Hannah was God's gift to them, and they were supposed to give her back to Him. THE BIG REVEAL Benson's background in pastoral care and his education in theology and leadership as a graduate of the MA in Leadership Program have proven to be ministerial assets in his work as a firefighter and paramedic in the Denver Metro Area. He regularly works in intense situations that require emotional distance and a clear head. All that training and experience, however, didn't help when it came to making a life or death decision about his little girl. It was the Lord moving in him and Rochelle that made the difference. Upon the realization that Hannah's bowels had gotten twisted—a problem unrelated to the difficulties of the pregnancy—the doctors laid out a procession of horrible options. The twist had caused her bowel to die, and its removal would require a constant IV drip 18 hours a day for the rest of her life, which they were assured wouldn't last beyond two years. "How long do we have to make this decision?" they asked. The doctor said, "She's still on the table right now, and we need the decision before we can sew her up." Benson looked at Rochelle and knew they were of one mind. Hannah was God's gift to them, and they were supposed to give her back to Him. Whatever hours they had left with her, they'd spend holding and loving her and praising God for the time they had with her. "The whole situation called us to take a serious look at our lives and to evaluate if we were really living what we said we believed." "I have this concept of a spiritual bank account," explains Benson. "It's based off a leadership concept that John Maxwell shares. Essentially, every step you take in your faith journey is an investment into that spiritual account. When something as catastrophic as losing Hannah happens, your account takes a huge hit. But if you've been steadily investing in that account with every prayer offered, every passage of Scripture read, and every dose of faith given from the Lord, even after a big hit you still have some spiritual fortitude in reserve. That is what you rest in when nothing else makes sense." Rochelle searched the Scriptures throughout her pregnancy, looking for hope that Hannah would be okay. But in that process, she realized God doesn't promise that. Rather, He promises to give peace that passes all understanding, that He will never leave your side, that nothing can separate you from His love, and so much more. Those promises came back to Rochelle and brought her comfort in a whole new way after the Lord took Hannah home. "The experience with Hannah—theologically it changed us," says Rochelle. "We had to hold the sorrow and grief in one hand and, in the other, the joy of all the things God has blessed us with and has allowed us to go through with Him." The whole experience revealed to them a much deeper theology and peeled away any superficial readings of Scripture they might have had. "There was a foundation of faith we both had that got us through," says Benson. They experienced a deep peace that came from letting go, leaning into God, and trusting Him. TAKE IT FROM HERE

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